* Lectures, Workshops & Events
Here’s a short list of lectures and events I’ve done:
* Leadership in the Bedroom: A Sexual Communication Workshop. Down-to-earth tips and ideas on how to communicate clearly about sex. This workshop was originally requested by the University of Illinois at Chicago, but I’ve given versions of it at other venues as well. It was one of the first workshops I ever designed, and I’m currently working on streamlining it and making it more interactive. I can do it in an hour, but prefer longer.
* BDSM Overview. Imagery deriving from bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, and sadomasochism (BDSM) is becoming commonplace — and we all know (or think we know) what a dominatrix is — but most people don’t have much idea of what BDSM actually involves. Although it is increasingly accepted as an alternative sexual orientation, BDSM remains surrounded by stigma, scandal and occasional legal action. This presentation covers the basics of BDSM (however, it’s not a how-to lecture — you aren’t going to learn how to use a whip, though you’ll learn where to go to find out!). I prefer to poll the audience to see what they want to cover on top of that — BDSM history? cultural landmarks? BDSM & feminism? legal issues? I’ve got it all! I have given this lecture more than any other; it was actually the subject of my first-ever blog post. It can be squished into an hour, but I prefer two hours, or even longer.
* Sex-Positivity for Everyone! Including the Mens! What is masculinity or male advocacy as a movement, and how is it in dialogue with contemporary feminism? Can it be incorporated into feminism, or can the values of the sex-positive feminist community speak to its concerns? What does positive, productive talk about masculinity sound like? I talk about all this in a short lecturette and then facilitate small discussions on kinky male sexuality, men in the pickup artist community, and men who buy sex. This workshop was originally requested by the University of Chicago, and based on feedback from that experience and others, I have been adapting it. It should take about 90 minutes.
* Confessions of a Pickup Artist Chaser. There’s a whole subculture out there devoted to teaching men how to seduce women. Over the last few years, these underground “pickup artists” have slowly surfaced into the popular consciousness, with the help of bestselling books like Neil Strauss’s The Game and hit reality shows like VH1′s “The Pick-Up Artist”. As of late 2011, I’ve been finishing two years of on-and-off research into these Casanovas. In this lecture I discuss my experiences talking to pickup artists, learning their techniques, understanding their community frameworks and norms, and eventually giving them tips on how to seduce women — plus my upcoming eBook, Confessions of a Pickup Artist Chaser: Long Interviews With Hideous Men. This presentation was originally created for a lunchtime talk at the Center for Gender Studies at the University of Chicago, and I can deliver it in 90 minutes or less.
* The Sex+++ Film Series at Jane Addams Hull-House Museum and related film screenings. I have now overseen many many screenings of sex-positive documentaries, and facilitated followup discussions afterwards. In the past I have done this primarily to accomplish my own activist educational goals or to raise funds for deserving institutions, but I’d be happy to run a screening or two upon request. Please note, however, that I don’t own the rights to all the films I’ve screened, and so if you want me to run a screening for you, you may need to budget extra in order to cover the rights. Here’s a list of the original film line-up for Sex+++, and here’s the 2011-2012 line-up.
I would certainly be willing to design a new workshop or lecture upon request — in fact, two of the above events were created at the request of the institutions that invited me. If you ask me to create a new event, though, please keep in mind that it will be an event I’ve never field-tested before! Still, feedback on my events has generally been good, even on the brand-new ones. And I am planning to start handing out feedback forms to everyone who attends one of my workshops, so I can get ever-more-precise input.
I live in Chicago, so if you want me to come to your institution, then you’ll have to consider how to get me there from Chicago, which usually means you pay my travel costs.
If you represent a super-deserving group, like for example a domestic abuse organization that wants advice on differentiating abuse from BDSM or on being alternative-sexuality friendly, then we can definitely negotiate my honorarium.




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